I DIDN’T WANT to be seen or heard—just to be swallowed up into a place where my anger could be unleashed. The gym hadn’t started out that way for me, as I have always been athletic and enjoyed being active. But just prior to my transition, as I suffered with an eating disorder that disrupted and consumed my life, the gym became my second destructive fixation.
I consider myself a fighter, in that I am willing to sit in what is uncomfortable. At the time, bodybuilding fit that bill perfectly in the way I chose to “use it,” through intense and overly demanding training sessions that were designed to shatter and disrupt the fragility of what made me human. Unfortunately, this regimen formed a beautiful relationship with my eating disorder. My muddled sense of self and gender identity supported this widespread emotional turmoil I was living through. I had numbed myself to a robotic entity, with zero regard or interest in my personal needs or wellbeing.
Seeking out therapy from someone who recognized the language of my disjointed internal dialogue allowed me to steer my perspective toward self-appreciation. I took a stand. I moved away from who I thought I had to be, and into who I wanted to be. In the same breath, the gym changed from a place to escape and tear down my being to a place that took on a new identity, and now complemented my life as Bari. The gym allowed me to seek safety and release pain from the past.
Now, the gym is my place of strength. I build character, discipline, and confidence in my body and mind. I sit deeply in the knowledge that fitness has shaped my identity, and strengthened my resolve as a transgender man. I have fitness to thank for always having my back and never letting me down.
I know I’m not the only one. As I was beginning to transition, I looked up to Cody Harman, a transgender fitness coach who was around the same age as me, and whose story you’ll read below. Seeing his path was inspiring and motivating to me, as I was only beginning to transition at the time. As my journey continued, I’ve had the opportunity to meet many kind individuals in the world of fitness, who, like me, are working to improve the way in which they see themselves. Community plays a huge role. Knowing you are not alone—that you can be seen and heard by people who understand—is monumental in developing confidence and self-trust.
This is why I am honored to be a part of this project, highlighting six fitness changemakers who are making the world easier and healthier for the trans community. Fitness has the power to change lives. I know, because it brought me out of hiding and into a space that prioritized self-worth. Fitness has taught me that the best relationship you should have in life is the one you have with yourself.
Max Adler Built the Trans-Friendly Gym He Always Wanted
Scott Percy, the World’s Strongest Trans Man, Is Ready to Defend His Title
How Viral Fitness Star Aydian Dowling Found True Gender Euphoria
Shawn Stinson’s Journey From 98-Pound Marine to Bodybuilding Champion
Mar Keller Couldn’t Find Trans Fitness Instructors, So He Became One
Cody Harman Explains Why Bodybuilding Is the Perfect Sport for Trans Men
The trans community is facing an unprecedented number of attacks from legislators across the country. Consider donating to the following organizations to support trans rights: The Okra Project, The National Center for Transgender Equality, The Marsha P. Johnson Institute, and more you can find here.
Calling all trainers from marginalized communities: Men’s Health‘s Strength in Diversity program is designed to help strengthen your brand and jumpstart your fitness career. Learn more here.
Contributor
Bari Glassman is a graduate student at Immaculata University studying Dietetics, and he intends to combine his passion for nutrition, and fitness, with his interest in cultural diversity, as a future professional practice. Glassman is a member of the Men’s Health & Women’s Health Strength in Diversity Initiative.
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