DATING IS HARD, period. But when you’re
polyamorous, meaning you’re open to having romantic relationships with more than one person at a time, it can feel even harder. Our society tends to view monogamy as the default relationship design, so if you’re into polyamory or other forms of non-monogamy, it’s easy to feel like you’re the only one out there.
That’s especially true when you’re looking for partners on more mainstream dating apps, says polyamory educator Leanne Yau—which is why getting on a polyamorous dating app can be so beneficial. “I often had to explain my [polyamorous] situation to people in detail only for them to reject or judge me,” she says. “People would tell me I shouldn’t be on dating apps if I already had a partner, or that my relationship was a joke and a failure. Or they’d slut-shame my partner or me and then get mad at me for their singlehood.” She’s also had people misunderstand her dynamic and desires, equating polyamory with non-commitment. (Yau remembers people telling her, “You’re polyamorous? Cool, I want something casual too!”)
The growing interest in non-monogamy has been accompanied by a growing number of apps that specifically cater to polyamorous people. We’ve also seen some older apps, like OkCupid, update their user interface to make it easier for polyamorous people to connect with like-minded partners.
Every app on this list was either designed specifically for non-monogamous folks, or it’s a mainstream dating app that has some way to filter searches for other poly people, whether it’s through pre-set filters, tags, or an “about me” section where you can describe your relationship style. Some of these poly dating apps even let you link your account with a partner, so you can search for matches as a unit. (Alas, you still can’t link your profile with multiple partners in any of these apps; if you’re an app developer, that’s a million-dollar idea right there.)
Here are the 9 best relationship apps for polyamorous folks.
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