SETTING HEALTHY BOUNDARIES is a life skill that many of us hear about, but we don’t really learn what it means or how to do it. Many people think that boundaries are rules we make for others, but it’s exactly the opposite. They’re the limits we set for ourselves within relationships. Someone with healthy boundaries is comfortable saying no to others when they want to, creating relationship dynamics where there is healthy communication. It’s important to hone the skills of setting and implementing boundaries to avoid losing yourself in your relationships.
Because you subscribe to Men’s Health MVP, you get access to our library of challenges, including this 2-week guide to setting boundaries in your relationships.
What we value and prioritize can change throughout our lives, which is why boundaries need to be flexible and not rigid. Sometimes we’ll have seasons of prioritizing work, and other times we want to prioritize time with family. Your boundaries are yours: yours to decide on, yours to set, and yours to enforce. For better or worse, someone else can’t do these things for you.
It helps to establish your boundaries before you’re in a sticky situation. Let’s say one of your boundaries is that you won’t do more than make out with someone on a first date. Deciding that and sharing that with your partner before the date will help ensure you don’t accidentally wind up doing something you didn’t want to do. That said, not all boundaries can be set ahead of time. Sometimes, we realize we need to set a boundary after we already feel violated or hurt, so we can make sure it doesn’t happen again. This can be painful—and it’s okay. We learn by doing.
If setting boundaries sounds uncomfortable, remember that someone who cares about you will respect your boundaries.That doesn’t mean they won’t push them—accidentally or on purpose—but they certainly won’t intentionally cross them. Sometimes boundaries are complex, and sometimes they’re a simple “No, I can’t.” I hope that by the end of this two-week guide, you will feel incredibly clear on what a boundary is, why they’re essential to a happy and healthy life, and how to establish and enforce your personal boundaries with the people in your life.
Your journey to healthier relationships starts here:
DOWNLOAD THE 2-WEEK BOUNDARY CHALLENGE
Psychotherapist Rachel Wright, MA, LMFT (she/her) is recognized as one of the freshest voices on modern relationships, mental health, and sex.
Comments are closed.