A Therapist’s 4-Week Guide to Managing Jealousy in Relationships

HAVE YOU EVER felt threatened in your relationship with someone and acted “out of character”? When we feel an overwhelming emotion like jealousy, it can be difficult to identify what’s going on and figure out how to regulate it.

Whatever kind of relationship(s) you’re in, navigating jealousy can be really tough. We don’t get much education about emotions in general, and jealousy is a complicated one. It’s not a “primary” emotion; instead, jealousy is made up of more than one emotion, so it can be hard to identify it, communicate effectively about it, and navigate our way through the icky feelings. However, since our emotions significantly impact our behavior, it’s vital that we understand what’s going on when we experience jealousy—and how to manage it.

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Let’s start with the basics: What is jealousy? Interestingly enough, there is no universally accepted definition. Jealousy can consist of one or more emotions, such as anger, resentment, inadequacy, helplessness, or disgust. Also, be aware: Jealousy is often
ONLY talked about in the context of romantic and/or sexual relationships, but it can happen in other situations, too. Have you ever been jealous of a friend? What about a sibling or cousin?

These exercises are NOT designed to make you never feel jealous again. You’re going to feel jealousy again, just like you’re going to feel joy, sadness, anger, anxiety, excitement, and confusion again. We cannot selectively numb emotions, as Brené Brown teaches. So, these exercises are meant to help you identify and navigate jealousy as it inevitably comes up.

How fast or slow you go through these exercises is entirely up to you, though I recommend
trying to get through them all in the 4 weeks. This is one of those processes unique to each person, so I don’t want to put time constraints on each of these introspective exercises.

Your journey starts here.

DOWNLOAD THE 4-WEEK GUIDE TO UNDERSTANDING AND NAVIGATING JEALOUSY